Monday, January 23, 2012

I May Be Paranoid, But That Doesn't Mean They Aren't Really Out To Get Me -- posted by Mom


My maiden voyage on my new Nook the children gave me for Christmas was a book called None Dare Call It Conspiracy by Gary Allen. Oh, it was so good I read it in a few hours. And it was free! Fortunately it was a rainy day and everybody was reading something, so there were no interruptions (except, of course, that bothersome eating business they insist on doing periodically). It was written in 1971, I think, and that makes it all the better to be able to read it with hindsight. I couldn't put it down.

I've been a "conspiracy theorist" for years simply because I've been a Bible believer for years, and every Bible reader knows the scriptures teach of the ancient conspiracy toward a one world government in order to usher in the Antichrist during the Apocalypse. Jesus and Paul tell of the evil men who'll wax worse and worse, and wickedness in high places, and of course John spills the beans on the whole thing in the book of The Revelation... that book which is so rarely read that John starts it by dangling a blessing for whosoever would read it to the Church. But the "church" is too busy running coffee houses and sending teenagers on "missions" trips, and all sorts of things Jesus never said to do, to bother with something that requires sobriety, or at least some semblance of an attention span.

I'm pretty sure the dumdums snicker at me being totally enthralled watching the conspiracy unfold because they are Biblically illiterate. Or maybe the predictable ploy of the conspirators to portray the theorists as kooks has been just that effective. Oh well, I can handle snicker-ers with aplomb.

Speaking of scoffer-types, Aunt Mary went to see Tintin by herself last week, and on her way home she looked for some place to eat in hopes it would wake her up for the drive. She went to a certain place she knows but the restaurant was closed so she was only able to order from the starters menu at the bar. There were a couple of big know-it-all men there who got all negative when she mentioned the Lord. One fellow challenged her to prove there is a God and she laughed and said that puny she need not try to prove God; he does a good job of proving Himself! One poor soul, not knowing the power of the Holy Spirit in Mary Lucia, boldly declared he didn't believe in God for this and that and she finally asked him if he owned a Bible. He said he did, but she looked him up and down in disbelief, yet he insisted he did own one. She told him he better hurry home and read it so as not to be such an ignoramus. Somehow, even though she was exposing them for the boobs they were, they kept the bar open for an extra hour and begged her to come back to continue the conversation later. As she was leaving, she overheard a waitress, who had been snippy earlier, say that Mary is the kind of woman who knows everything she always wanted to know! Somehow the Lord had those haughty people eating out of her hand. One fellow admitted that he set out to give her a hard time because she was confident.

I'll say she's confident! One time she was on the scene of a terrible jaws-of-life car accident with a boy pinned to the steering wheel. The car caught fire, so Mary jumped in the passenger's side, and started praying and laying hands on him. Folks were hollering for her to get out for fear the car was going to blow any minute. She refused, yelling, "IT WON'T BLOW WITH ME IN HERE!" She stayed in the car with that boy until the fire department and ambulance arrived and they safely got him out. She believes he actually died during that ordeal and God put his life back in him, and I don't doubt it. Oh my Mary. Oh my Lord.

Next up on my Nook: Tragedy & Hope: A History of the World in Our Time by Carroll Quigley. It's free too! (Snicker, snicker)

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